Hello, listeners.
The weather is beautiful outside of the radio station tonight. A bit of a warm wind blowing through, of course, but that's just how it is around here. The stars are shining, the moon is bright, and there is not a cloud in the sky. It's perfect weather for star-gazing, if I do say so myself.
Some strange people came by the town square today. They wore suits, all black, and came in a car with World Government license plates. Who are they? Why are they here? No one knows, but some kids playing in the area said they overheard them discussing scary words, like 'manhunt' and 'capture'. They seemed to be looking for something... or someone.
I don't know what such people would be looking for in our little town, listeners, but best be on the safe side. Lock your doors, keep the pets inside, and perhaps consider staying out of their way until the trouble has passed.
On an unrelated note, the old factory by the outskirts of town appears to have been finally sold to someone today. Farmer Stan by the old gas station nearby mentioned seeing some men milling around outside the decrepit building, carrying heavy sacks and large, metal containers.
'It looked like they were clearing things out,' he said, 'maybe moving things in.'
The factory's been left abandoned since its invasion and subsequent carpet-bombing back in 2007, when a small team of intrepid mole people attacked the building, chased out its workers, and declared the surrounding area the first mole-person stronghold in the land of the sun-walkers. This was, of course, followed by a quick response from our City Council, which immediately sent out its team of unmarked fighter jets to handle the issue in a calm and respectful manner.
These unmarked fighter jets, of course, do not actually exist. And anyone claiming otherwise is deluded and possibly dangerous, and should report immediately to the school gym to be re-educated.
Speaking of our mighty City Council, a memo has just been issued out from the mayor's office to all residents. It's full of letters and strings in some foreign languages of old, but also contains instructions for handling the strange men who have just appeared in town. And since we here at the radio station believe in the dissemination of information, I will reproduce the memo here for you, listeners, so that you may be just as informed as your neighbors on the current state of the town.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1fGMdGDrRUn649KzrPWD_dCq4jzV3TX-mFOeknu2HH_o/And it seems we are out of time for this session, so I suppose we will end this here. Goodnight, listeners, sleep tight. And remember to read through the City Council's memo before heading off to bed tonight.
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